Latest Quotes

I've been collecting amusing quotes from several different sources lately. I don't know if there's something in the air, but geez....

1. Hubby's Female Team Teacher: (upon seeing me help hubby prepare his classroom for school) "Oh, you're such a nice wife! I wish I had a wife...."

(Not a bad idea, that.)

2. Me: "How was school today?"

LM: "Good. I made a new friend!"

Me: "Really! What's his name?"

LM: "I don't know-- I just call him Optimus."

3. LM: "I hate school!"

Me: "I'm sorry to hear that. How can I help you like it more?"

LM: "You can buy me a new Starscream." (Transformer.)

4. LM: (after I'd repaired his Transformer for the umpteenth time) "Oh, good! It's as brand as new!"

(Hmmmm, I'm seeing a theme in all of LM's quotes here. Maybe it's time to lay off the You Tube Transformer episodes for a while.)

5. This next one requires a bit of background. Ruby Jane and I were at the grocery store (the one where we find all the crazies working-- anymore we go there for entertainment as much as their low prices) and our checker was...um...trying to be funny-- but she was coming off as just plain loony. After saying something that especially amused herself she blurted, "the sarcasm kicked in in about an hour and a half!"

Huh? Then as we were leaving she yelled out to Ruby Jane, "thanks for the toys!"

Ruby Jane looked at me, confused, and asked, "she's drunk, right?"

Maybe so, honey, maybe so....

6. Ruby Jane's Soccer Teammate: (upon walking up to Ruby while she and I were kicking a ball back and forth) "Is that your sister?"

Ruby Jane: (disgusted) "No! That's my mom! She just wishes she were young."

Me: (delighted) "Wait! You can call me her sister!"

(I've got to invite that sweet girl over for dinner sometime.)