Friday, October 12, 2012

Non-Stop Talk

Hubby and LM are the stars of this post. Between the two of them, there is never a dull moment around here, whether it's 12:00 in the afternoon or 12:00 at night.

1. Hubby: (asleep??) "Son."
Me: (looking intently at hubby, trying to discern his level of consciousness. He cracks an eye open).
Hubby: (asleep??) "I'm not sleep-talking, I'm just saying 'son'."
(Hmmmmmm. Either he was sleep-talking, or hubby is super weird. Either answer is likely.)

2. Hubby: (asleep-- for sure) "Let me be clear. You're knocking over sheets. You're crumpling them, kicking them off, getting them dirty. I think I'm going to get angry."

3. LM: (smelling a whiff of something foul) "Whoever dealt it...eats it."
(Whoa-- that's harsh.)

4. Hubby: (asleep) "It might have been 93, I can't remember.... It was good, though!" (Proceeds to laugh hysterically.)

5. LM: (after repeatedly being shot down when asking for items at the store) "Can you please just buy something so that I'll say, 'you're awesome, Mom'?"
(Um. No.)

6. LM: "Mom, I want a Monster energy drink for my next meet-- can you dig it?"
Me: "Ummmm...yeah, I can dig it."
(Groovy, man!)

7. LM: (whole-heartedly singing his version of a popular Neon Trees song) "Whoa-oh, I want some more! Whoa-oh, what are you waiting for? What are you waiting for? Take the body off me!"

8. Hubby: (asleep) "Soft boy!"

9. LM: "The counselor asked me if I was having any problems, so I told her I live in an old house, we're a very poor family, and that it's all (blank's) fault we're in this situation!"
(Aye, aye, aye, bud.... The school counselor meant any problems at school!)

10. Hubby: (asleep-- giggling) "Ohhhhh! It's a problem when you're laughing and trying to chew gum-- you'll suck it right down your windpipe!"

11. Hubby: (asleep-- very sarcastically) "Gee, can you think of a fine game to play where nobody has to leave right now? Oh good! October-- let's start there!"

Yep. Never a dull moment.