If I Had A Hammer....

We have begun some home projects around here. We have about a million of 'em. Mostly just little details that were never finished, or items that have been broken or worn out, nothing too major...yet. But as is usual with projects, one thing leads to another until you've shelled out half your life savings for what you thought was a simple lightbulb change. Our upstairs bathroom sink was cracked, so hubby thought, hey, what a great weekend project! Well, one thing led to another.... We now have a new sink, pedestal, plumbing and a splash guard for the shower. (And two new mini-projects that were spawned by the sink replacement, which are, of course, still unfinished.) Aye, aye, aye. Two steps forward, one step back....

But let's step forward into some quotes, shall we? (Ugh, still struggling with those segues....)

1. LM: (riding in the car, halfway to our destination) "I have to go PEEEEEEEEEEE!!!"

Hubby: "Don't think about it! Just think about bunnies running in a field instead."

Me: "Can you do it, bud?"

LM: "No! I'm thinking about bunnies peeing!"

2. Hubby: (as I crawled into bed and who, let it be known, remained asleep for this entire interaction) "Take it easy! No need to get wild! You almost kicked me in the balls-- and that's the last thing I need!"

(In my defense, his balls were never in any danger.)

3. Occupational Therapist: (speaking of the annoying music accompanying a software program) "Let's turn the sound on the computer down."

LM: "Thanks! You just gave me my desire!"

Occupational Therapist: (turning to me) "Does he just crack you up at home?"

Me: "Yep."

4. LM: "Mom, who will I look like when I'm older?"

Me: "Like Popi."

LM: "Awesome!"

5. Mister: (when asked by his mother about the huge booger in his hair) "I tried to put it on my knee, but it got my knee dirty, so I put it on my tummy, but it wouldn't stick, so I put it in my hair!"

(And we weren't worried about our hair being dirty? Hmmmm, I'm having trouble tracking with the 2-year old logic here.)

6. The Bopper: (upon seeing a black lady in the drive-thru window) "Look, Mom! She's a African girl! She lives in Africa!"

(A bit sheltered, are we?)

7. LM: (after the girlish screams in the basement-- coming from Ruby and her friend-- had finally ceased) "Let me go see if they're dead yet."

Me: "If they're dead??"

LM: "Yeah, the screaming stopped."

(Oh, of course, I see....)

8. LM: "I had the worst day ever! All because of girls!"

(Get used to it, bud.)

9. The Bopper: (after her brother had said something she clearly found distasteful) "That a stupid thought, Mister. That stupid!"

(I'm posting this one trusting that The Bopper will be safe from any disciplinary repercussions.)

10. LM: (responding to his sister's food aversions) "Ruby, just man-up about mushrooms-- they're tasty!"

(Yeah, Ruby! Man-up!)

Have a great week, everyone!