Hiiiiiiiiii-YA!

Holy cow it's been a busy week. But that's neither here nor there....

LM went back-to-school shopping with hubby's mom tonight. And I'm almost 100% sure I will regret allowing him to keep some of his selections, including this one:

Yes, that is a jacket. A ninja jacket. The hood zips all the way down his face to give that charming criminal look. But how do I say no to this face?

I can't.

Anyway, I have some quotes today:

1. Bopper: (on the phone with me) "Auntie, I lost two teeth!"
Me: "I know!"
Bopper: "I'm just soooo cute!"
(Two teeth gone; self-esteem still very present.)

2. LM: "...and then one dinosaur took the guy's legs in his mouth, and the other dinosaur took the other end of him and ripped him in two...."
Me: (interrupting) "Yikes!"
LM: "Actually, it was pretty godly to share their human."
(Yep, no doubt about it, those dinosaurs must have been Christians! Wait....)

3. Mister: "Ruby, you know, I'm just like God."
Ruby: "Why, Mister?"
Mister: "Because I eat bread."
(Well, if that's all there is to it, I have arrived!)

4. LM: "Dad can't even make the velociraptor sound-- like in Jurassic Park. But if we got a resonating chamber for him, he'd love it!"
(Amazon.com has those, right?)

5. Me: (to Bopper) "Carson sure likes you!" (Carson is our ancient Boxer.)
Bopper: "Yeah, I give her good rubbers."
(Yikes...can we please just call it petting instead?)

6. Me: "Will you grab me that book, Monkey Butt?"
LM: (trying to clarify this odd new term) "Are you calling me the monkey and Carson the butt?"
Me: "No. But Carson does smell like a butt...and you smell like a monkey."
LM: "But Mom, monkeys smell like butts, too."
Me: "Oh, I guess you might be right. Sorry about that, Monkey Butt."
LM: "Mooooooooommmm!"
(It must be hard having a mom who is barely more mature than you are....)

7. LM: (after I'd been reading to him for an hour) "Keep reading!"
Me: "I can't anymore, bud. My voice is tired."
LM: "Mom, I don't think in studies they've ever found that voices can be tired."
(His Aspie literalness...gets me every time.)

8. Me: 'LM, please go wash your hands before dinner."
LM: (hucks a loogie into his hands and rubs 'em together).
Me: "Uh, no, go wash them for real."
(I have no words....)

9. Hubby: (asleep) "Hands-offy! Too many times people reach for that stinkin' math! I said hands-OFF! That'll teach 'em."

10. LM: "Dad, I don't like it when you do all that explaining stuff. It annoys me."
(By "explaining" he of course meant "lecturing". And kids all around the world cheered.)

Well, that's it for today, folks!