Live-- From The Couch!

It's Christmas break!  Woohoo!  I'm still in my bathrobe!

Got some quotes for ya:

1. Ruby: (exasperated) "Why is my nose so shiny?!"
Me: "You're getting to the age where that happens."
Ruby: "What?!  You mean I'm getting to the age where my body parts are going to start getting shiny?!"
Me: "Uhhhhh--"
Ruby: "I'm going to need a sign that says, 'Caution, shiny body parts may cause permanent blindness'."
LM: "Don't worry, people won't notice your weird nose."
(Time to introduce Ruby to pressed powder....)

2. LM: "I told Mason that if he didn't work harder in school, he'd grow up to be a stinky fisherman!"
(Way to speak encouragement into people's lives, bud.  However, stinky fisherman oftentimes make very good livings....)

3. Hubby: (asleep-- and angry) "You'd better get thinkin'!"
(Must've been dreaming about one of his students.)

4. LM: "Mom, you're the best mom ever!"
Me: "Ahhh, thanks, bud!"
LM: "And Dad...he's close to the best dad."
(Er....)

5. LM: "Mom, come see...I'm redecorating my room!"
Me: (looking at some unauthorized artwork on his dresser, then scowling at him) "What's this?"
LM: (looking guilty and sheepish) "Uh, sorry Mom, that's not part of the tour."
(But it'll be part of the cleanup, right?)

6. Ruby: "You know how they say, 'holy infant so tender and mild'?"
Me: "Yeah?"
Ruby: "That makes me think of chicken."
(Gee thanks, Rube, now it will for the rest of us too.)

7. LM: (keeping me apprised of his progress on self-censoring his thoughts) "Mom, don't worry, I didn't call Robert fat today."
Me: (nervously) "Uhhh, that's good.  What...did you say?"
LM: "I said that if we had a humongous cake, Robert would definitely eat it."
(Yikes.)

8. LM: (looking at a picture of Ruby, then very casually stating) "Hey, Rube, you look hot there."
(Ruby was disgusted by this compliment.  Apparently we need to let LM know that, generally speaking, brothers do not call their sisters "hot" in any circumstance.)

9. LM: "Justin Beaver's pretty good...for a beaver."
(We've tried to correct LM, but it's impossible.)

10. LM: (looking at our dog fondly) "I really value this mutt."

That's it for now!  In case I don't post beforehand, merry Christmas!