Monday, April 18, 2011

Birds And Bees, Please

Every Monday I pick LM up from school early so we can go to his occupational therapy appointment. Today as he was traipsing down the hall toward me, he had some exciting news:

"Hey Mom! Brylie told me how babies are made-- sex!"

Giggles erupted from eavesdropping parents hanging around the office. I was momentarily dumbfounded. "Ohhhhhhh myyyyyy," was all I managed to eek out. We made our way out the door and I tried to gather my wits about me for the impending discussion.

"Did he tell you what sex is?"

"Nope! Hey Mom, can you have another baby?"

"Well...no...."

"Why? Is your sex broken?"

"Ummmmmm, no." (My mind was reeling for a way to take charge of this conversation and fast!) "It's true that sex makes babies. But daddy had an operation done so that we can't have any more."

"Ohhhhh-- 'cause he had too much of sex?"

I couldn't contain myself and burst out laughing. Why do I suck at these conversations??

"No, buddy. Sex isn't a thing, it's something that mommies and daddies do. It's private and I don't want you to talk about it with your classmates. If you have questions you can ask Mom and Dad anytime."

Thank heavens for small mercies, the boy didn't have any further questions for me at the moment. (Phew!) He seemed not at all interested in the specific mechanics of sex, which is just as well-- I have no idea how to go about explaining that to my obsession-prone aspie. And to expect him to keep that fascinating information to himself would be asking entirely too much. All of you with young children should be aware that the moment my son gains this exciting knowledge is the moment he will share it-- in detail-- with your wee ones. I accept no responsibility for this!

But for now, your children's ears are safe...relatively speaking. The fact is, LM now knows the word "sex". Yeah, scratch that, your children are about to get educated.

You're welcome! :)

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