Quotables

Whew-- it was a wild one last week! I haven't posted for a few reasons-- I've been gone, and I've been an angry person. But it's amazing how quickly anger dissipates when you write it all down in a scolding letter and send it off to the one(s) who wronged you. :) Ahhhhh, I feel so much better! The situation hasn't quite become funny yet (hysterical, yes-- but not in a good way), but when I reach that point you can be sure you'll read about it here first! In the meantime, I have quotes....

1. M-i-L: (walking into the bathroom) "Who was in here last? The water's running, they didn't flush the toilet-- and it's POOP!"

LM: "My bad!"

2. LM: (talking about a toy he'd ordered online and was anxiously awaiting) "I freakin' want it today!"

(Ummmm.... Okay, hubby, you were right-- I guess I do say "freakin'" too much....)

3. LM: (to the mailman) "Kind sir, do you have a package in there?"

(I don't know where he got it, but he's been addressing men he doesn't know as "kind sir" lately.)

4. Me: (in my cheery auntie voice) "Bopper, don't touch the TV screen, sweetie."

The Bopper: "But I didn't learn that yet!"

Me: "Well, now you learned it!"

The Bopper: (sadly) "No, I didn't."

(I guess aunties aren't quite as effective teachers as mothers are.)

5. LM: "Mom, you know Auntie T's last name? It's kinda a nickname for boobs."

(Or, as T puts it, "boobs are kinda a nickname for my last name." I'm not sure who's right, though.)

6. LM: "You know the best part of incorporated? Corporated!"

(Uhhhh.... Wha'?)

7. LM: (after we'd been teasing hubby for being a dork-- which is a good thing in our family) "Mom, next time just marry somebody else."

Me: "Like who?"

LM: "Mr. Craig."

(I gotta say, though, I'm having a pretty hard time believing that Mr. Craig isn't a dork as well. Perhaps his wife can verify?)

8. Ruby Jane: "Mom, can you read to us now?"

Me: "No, because you guys didn't obey-- that was the deal."

Ruby: "But I obeyed eventually!"

(I'm thinking there are some profound spiritual revelations in there. Brain. Is. Trying. Hard. To. Grasp. Them! Ugh...it's no use....)

Sheesh-- I thought I had more than that, but I must not have written them all down. Oh well, there's always more where those came from!