A Kiddo Quote Overview

So, my dad was reading my kiddo quotes from the other day and reminded me that he, too, keeps a record of the funny things his grandchildren say.  Oh, yeah!  And he has some good ones!  So he emailed me his list that goes back several years, and I selected my favorites for your viewing pleasure.

Ruby Jane's List:

12/04: "I'll show you who's boss... you're mother."

3/05:  "I don't have any super powers... I just have sneaky powers."

4/05:  

Popi: "Ruby, I hear you want to do ballet instead of soccer." 

Ruby Jane: "No, I want to do Disneyland instead of soccer."

Popi: You don't want to do ballet?"

Ruby: "No, they don't have that at Disneyland."

5/05: 

Ruby Jane: "Popi, you have a hole in your shirt.  You need to stop eating candy."

Popi: "Why do I need to stop eating candy?"

Ruby: "It makes you too fat for your shirt... like Mr. Incredible."

(The hole in his t-shirt was the size of a bb and near the collar bone.)

5/05: "Nini and Popi's house reminds me of Sugar, and Sugar reminds me of dog poop, and dog poop reminds me of Carson, and that makes me miss her."

7/05: 

Ruby Jane: "Mom, can I have some wine?"

Me: "No.  We don't have any and you aren't old enough."

Ruby: "Is it because wine has 'drunk' in it?"

9/05: "Mama, instead of calling you 'Mama' can I just call you 'Barbie'?"

(Why didn't that ever catch on, by the way??)

4/06: 

Ruby Jane: "Mama, what is a honeymoon?"

Me: "It is a very special trip that occurs immediately after a couple's wedding, and is very fun."

Ruby: "Oh, you mean like you can go to Costco and get hot dogs?"

Me: "It is even more fun and special than that!"

Ruby: "You mean you get to go to a park and play?"

Me: "Even more fun, like going to Hawaii, just the two of you."

Ruby: (frowning) "That sounds boring!"

7/06: "Do you know what I like to do?  I like to roll my boogers between my fingers until they're hard little balls.  Then I pinch them in half, roll them again, and stuff them back up my nose."

1/07: 

LM: "Ruby Jane hit me!"

Ruby: "But it was an accident... I think."

Me: "You think it was an accident?"

Ruby: "Well, I didn't see the whole thing...."

11/07:

(After LM wipes a booger on Ruby's hat and runs off laughing, I tell Ruby): "Welcome to the world of brothers, honey."

(Ruby Jane then takes the booger off the hat and runs after LM, wipes it on him and says to her brother): "Welcome to the world of sisters, honey!"

3/08:  (Ruby Jane asks LM if he wants to wrestle.  LM says okay and then Ruby warns him): "But don't try what Dad does.  He's not exactly a good example."

LM's List:

9/05: (LM pointing to the dog) "Carson has teets."  (Then grabbing his wee-wee) "Dis MY teet!"

8/06: (After I got LM in trouble for picking styrofoam packing out of the case for Popi's Bocce Ball game, he went over to Popi and said...) "Popi's mad!  Popi doesn't like anybody touching his balls!"  (Popi expertly supressed his laughter although I don't know how.)

11/06:

LM: "Grandma Bernie, you shouldn't eat poo-poo."

Grandma: "What's that?"

LM: "It's disgusting!"

12/06:

Me: "LM, you stay close to me now-- don't you run away."

LM: "But I need to run away because I need exercise." 

12/06:

LM: (staring longingly at a pile of presents) "Are those my presents?"

Nini: "No, those are for Tre and Bailey."

LM: "Hmmmm....  We'll split them."

(Do I see a future politician here, perhaps?)

11/07:

LM: (speaking to the washing machine repairman) "Man, do you live in a house?"

Repairman: "Yes."

LM: "Does it have a bathroom?"

Repairman: "Yes."

LM: "Do you like to poop in it?"

Repairman: (smiling for the first time) "Yes I do!"

The Bopper's List (short, but sweet):

4/09: (The Bopper is at Costco with her mom eating a hot dog but peeling off the bun) "I don't like the butt!"